Ever since I was a young boy, I have had a strong sexual attraction to my mother. She always took it as a compliment whenever the family went to, say a theme park or something, and I wanted to be paired up with her. She had no idea it was because I fantasized about being her mate. I often time tried to ‘accidentally’ walk in on her when I knew she would be in a state of undress. I also later took to window peeping on her. I couldn’t even guess how many times in my life I have masturbated and ejaculated spying on her while fantasizing I was having sex with her. I feel shame and guilt about it. In one sense, I am kinda doing tribute to her beauty, but I am also mentally defiling her. Even now that she has passed, I still masturbate to pictures of her in her younger days. I do love you, Mom – even if it is in a perverse way.
Your love is still true