I don’t go a lot of places because of my health, but when I do strange things always seem to happen. The other day I went to get my mail at my PO Box and per usual a woman started chatting me up as if she was talking to a ghost before I showed up. It was a girl really as women are often 26 and up in my view.
Bizarre. I feigned interest but wanted to wire her mouth shut. She was better to look at than talk to. I figured she would eventually shut up.
I realized she had some mental issues or had too much coffee. I let it go as I just wanted my mail. I then stupidly said something to either shut her up or leave her in a specific mood, only I did not know which one was about to come.
I do this sometimes as it sometimes seems necessary. I said for a young college girl, you’re actually attractive for a blonde, go figure.
MShe did shut up but the look screamed I want to hit you. I wish she did. It would have brought out a smile which is rare for me.
Nope. A strange smirk that did not seem hostile. Yep. This girl is sadly my type in some f**ked up form. She had stopped incessantly talking and by body language alone was aroused.
This made me happy, but I fully expected her to get her mail before I got mine and enjoy the half compliment. Sadly, no. Maybe that is good. Maybe I just don’t care anymore. It varies.
She turned around as a typical older, lost person was attempting to send a package and that often takes 20 minutes and is annoying af. The girl asked why I did not like blondes.
I told the truth that they are boring. They are supposed to be all that when brunettes sell it better without acting crazy. Also, yellow is not appealing.
I assured her it was just a personal preference, but dirty blondes are normally ok. She again asked why dirty blondes? I said because they’re closer to brunette and seemingly mostly stable even though crazy has its perks unless a knife is around.
She asked why I joked so much and I told her why are you assuming I’m joking? Another strange look. I’m used to them. No big deal.
The old woman at the window was more hopeless than most at the window and I was becoming anxious and wanting to get back home to get a cup of tea.
I was getting a migraine and should’ve just told the girl let’s go f**k somewhere as it was now sadly on my mind.
I just stood there staring at the ceiling. Staring at her perfect a** and started having trouble breathing.
I have GAD and cannot wait for long periods of time, so this was inevitable. It was becoming obvious I was in full blown panic attack mode, but I weathered it the best I could. I chew a lotta gum as it’s best to control one’s nerves.
The girl asked for some and said she wished she had a lollipop. Tease. I smiled and said that that would be a sight to see. Chit chat without a screen is so much more fun, so why do people hide behind them instead of engaging naturally I thought.
I’m older so the internet was not around and life was more innocent and pure. No offense. This girl annoyed the f**’ out of me as most young people do, but here I became curious.
I liked what I started hearing and was thinking in a positive fashion which is rare for this version of me as I always expect the worst. How weird.
She finally got to the window to get her mail and I got my packages soon afterwards. She told me she enjoyed our conversation as she deemed it strangely fascinating. I smiled and said no problem.
As I was leaving, she told me she worked at a cafe 2 blocks down and to come grab a coffee and say hello. I rarely go to such places anymore at this point in my life, but I might attempt it.
I’m not into generation Z but this girl is fascinating. Perhaps, there’s hope for you guys. Again, no offense. She’s a kid though in my eyes and I’d rather have a good conversation.
Perhaps I’m more of a freak than I feel. Lord knows anymore. I’ll take the positivity anywhere I can in this uptight, embarrassing excuse for a world.
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