My dad beat me, hasn’t called or even remembered my existence in 10 years. My brother raped me for 4 years, tried to kill me 3 times, and my mom tried to kill me. Everyone who I was born to be loved by wants me dead.
I don’t know how to cope with that anymore. I just live with it. I forgave my mother because she was acting sad and bringing it up constantly. I don’t forgive any of them and I don’t know how to live with this anymore.
With your dad it’s probably the best that way.
With your brother it’s several criminal offenses and he should be be in prison at the very least. Even if you don’t think that for yourself, such person walking around freely is also a danger to others. How likely it is to report it to police I don’t know. It depends on the country you are from.
Next thing is your age. How likely it is for you to move out and settle further away from them or leave together with your mother.
Then read and listen about what healthy relationships/friendships are like, go to places that interest you and find likeminded people with similar interests. It’s easier to bond with them. We can’t choose our relatives, but we can choose our friends. But do so only when prepared before, knowing what’s the healthy versions are to look for. Toxic people can spot those that have been harmed before more easily and try to do more harm to them further as it’s more likely to to get away with it for them. But when knowing how to spot the differences when only meeting someone for the first time or in couple of times, it’s easy to avoid them.