I transferred last semester and met this guy in my major because he became my mentor. He’s very intelligent, kind, funny, and talented. He’s awesome; everyone either loves him or is secretly jealous of him. He’s become my friend, confidante, and someone I look up to. He can read me better than my mom can. He drives me home. He remembers my food order. It’s the little things. He’s such a marshmallow. I admire him and respect him more than any other person in my life. Platonically, I absolutely love him.
What’s bothering me is the gradual realization that I’m romantically interested in him. He’s not unattractive, but he’s not who I’m usually giving a second glance. But now I find myself wondering where he is throughout the day, or listening for his voice, or paying attention to his mood. Last night he was fooling around with a cable we had taped down in our workspace, and I just watched him run his fingers up and down the sides of it like it was a vulva. I was staring intently and daydreaming. I’m kinda love sick. I don’t like it.
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