Before and during the pandemic I helped so many people, some on the verge of suicide that I lost count. And in dealing with everyones issues or problems I just want someone consistently loving & stable & reliable to come home to I can cuddle, kiss and watch movies with to regenerate and recharge myself like a Duracell battery. It amazes me how, out of the thousands of selfish people I know or see, that they are oblivious to my need for affection too and that not one can see this need in me or even cares to meet it when they know I am single and do not have a family of my own to love or care for me. And I wonder how many other nurses or medical personal or care takers are absolutely burning out because no one gives a damn about our needs in the midst of caring for people (drowning in overworked schedules and long hours) who would die without us and our support. If you have family or friends in medicine; cook them a hot meal, buy them breakfast or lunch, chat over coffee on zoom, platonic snuggle and watch a movie with them to restore them via TLC (you don’t even have to talk,) let them vent, embrace us, sos people. So I decided to take a year off and see if even 1 person would step up to meet my needs at this time, no one has. I am retiring until someone does, so if thousands die due to a lack of my presence or life saving medical work, so be it. Kindness, care and compassion is a two lane road based in reciprocity. I am done over giving. Being a good friend or human is free. And I suggest all the ungrateful, self serving and self centered people better wake the fuck up about their neglectfully abusive lack of love and care and well being of those of us on the front lines of this pandemic. We are human too with needs of our own that must be met.
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